The Slazon Report #112400
Straining Gnats and Swallowing Camels

Matthew 23:24 [Ye] blind guides, which strain at a gnat, and swallow a camel.

The current political situation is a study in “gnat straining” and “camel swallowing”. While you are busybusybusy “gnat straining”, with your eyes riveted on Florida and your thoughts cemented to dimples and chads, the Illuminatic Masons, spawn of ye old Sanhedrin (aka your masters), are busybusybusy “stuffing camels” down your throat. You’re choking on your freedom and I bet you haven’t even noticed it. That’s because you prefer form over substance and have failed to “know your enemy and know yourself”.

“Know your enemy and know yourself; in a hundred battles, you will never be defeated. When you are ignorant of the enemy but know yourself, your chances of winning or losing are equal. If ignorant both of your enemy and of yourself, you are sure to be defeated in every battle.”
--Sun Tzu The Art of War

Your enemy knows everything about you. They have been gathering data on your for a long, long time. They know what you eat, what toilet paper you buy, what websites you visit, how much you earn, how much you spend and they know your sexual habits too. They know EXACTLY how to control you. To them you are a “gnat” and they are experts at “stuffing camels” down gnat’s throats.

You, on the other hand, know next to nothing about them. How could you? Where would you get the time or the resources to get to know them? You’re too busybusybusy straining your little gnat’s jaws so you can swallow more, bigger and better camels. “Camels”, by the way, are worldly goods that you can not afford, do not need, but buy anyway. The currency you use for these purchases is your freedom. (And you thought it was your banking digits.) When you “swallow a camel” you mortgage your future. In other words, you are enslaved in the pyramid scheme.

Freedom, in case you forgot, is your divine inheritance. Since you squander it for a trinket you deserve to lose it. And since you prefer to be a spectator in the Game of Life you deserve to sit in front of your television set with a remote “control” (ha ha ha) in one hand and a can of beer in the other. (Pssst...that can of beer is your baby bottle.) If you own a video camera and want to see yourself the way your enemy sees you, train it on yourself during the Super Bowl. That should shock the hamburger out of you.

Christians! Better get your gnat’s jaws open wide. The next big camel stuffing event is just around the corner. Merry Christmas!

Jana Janus
Omnipresent