In the predawn of creation God was bored, bored to suicide, but then a miracle happened–he had an idea. A good idea for him. A bad idea for man (so it was perfect).

Right after lunch he called a meeting with the intelligences that existed and said, “I God, have a plan. Let’s build a world where everything murders everything in order to eat and survive, and then I’ll create physical bodies for you to dwell in–avatars, disguises (think of it as Halloween which you will invent later). When you incarnate in that world–which will only be for a few years–you won’t remember who you really are because that wouldn’t be any fun.

One of the Intelligence asked, “How will we get into and out of that world?”

God said, “Well...you’ll cry like baby getting in and scream like hell getting out, but trust me, the exciting adventures in between will be worth it, and after your human bodies turn to shit and you get back here we’ll do lunch and joke about it.”

The intelligence asked, “What did you mean when you said ‘you’ll cry like a baby getting in and scream like hell getting out...’?”

God asked, “ Did I say that? What I meant is, you may not enjoy all your experiences, but all your experiences will serve you (and other intelligences) and you’ll come back with greater knowledge, understanding and wisdom which will increase your capacity to experience greater joys. It will be hard, but to take the edge off there will be booze, drugs, sex and rock ‘n’ roll.

THE ABOVE IS THE NEW INTRODUCTION to the book, WHAT I TELL MY KIDS--HUMANS ARE NUTS WHEN NOT TOO BUSY BEING CRYBABIES.