http://balkans.aljazeera.net/blog/kako-je-steven-seagal-postao-srbin

4 Jan 2016 Rev. 10:31 CET

"There is Vucic, there is Sigal!
Belgrade is to be bypassed in a wide arch! "- The main terrorists must have said when he was making a plan of engagement for 31 December evening.

Now it's just a matter of time before in Serbia appears Jackie Chan.

By: Dragoljub-Draza Petrovic

In Munich, on the New Year's Eve was in force alert for possible terrorist attacks. Belgrade did not have such problems: what terrorist is foolish enough to walk around the city in which, by a decision of the local authorities, in the New Year's music program has been included Stephen Seagal's blues band, the holder of a aikido black belt, of the seventh day, the star of Hollywood action movies, a man always ready to dismember bad guys "an mass".

"There is Vucic, there is Sigal! Better to bypass Belgrade in a wide circle! ", This must have been said by the main terrorist when he made a plan of engagement for 31 December in the late evening.

Seagal's band, formally speaking, played as a support to Nice Brena on stage set in front of the Serbian Parliament. It was a logical decision: the blues is a musical genre that Serbs like as much as Strauss polkas, Bach fugue or Chopin's piano etudes. So, no way, when in a club plays Texas Flood, the Belgrade blues masters band , far larger than Swagal's, barely a hundred people come. Mostly everyone knows each other.

Fans of blues who in June 2014 were at a Seaqal's concert in the "Sava Center" said that he has an excellent backing band, but that he is not a bluesman with whom you "rip off". He more lines on "old glory" that has nothing to do with blues, as it has to do with a knockout.

"He plays guitar as beginner. He sings a bit better than that," told disappointed Belgrade bluesers.

SWAT Training

Concert in Sava Center lasted barely an hour. Sigal has dramatically changed several guitars, mostly with his back turned to the audience looking at the drums, and then ended up with the suite on a raft Sava, surrounded buljucima female world that is more "horny" on celebrities for, but the blues singers.

Foundation "Braca Karic", however, long ago decided that Sigala reward for charity and humanitarian work, and on this occasion the second time on a visit to Serbia as an ambassador of the Foundation "Art, freedom, power". And only then started a real miraculous love Sigala and the Serbian government, which is crowned with a New Year stalls Lepa Brena.

Music for the wildest night was just part of the package: Sigal then promised Belgrade Mayor Sinisa Mali to make every effort to be in in Serbia recorded Hollywood movies. It also agreed to hold training and police special forces of the Serbian MUP, although it is probably logical that the special forces better trained than Sigala. What, indeed, the film looks like a machine serial beating evil uncle, but every reader of newspaper columns such as "All I Did not Know About ...", is familiar with the fact that most of the mayhem Sigalovih recorded doubles. He appears only in close-ups.

In various international sections "Everything you did not know about Steven Seagal" and writes that often make that assisted in the training of agents of the CIA, and that he actively lied to actively cooperated with the agency. All of his many ex-wives disprove his story, and say that we even fought against the Japanese yakuza. Of course, out of the film.

"Are you people aware that we live in a country in which the actor Steven Seagal to train special units? It's lucky that we have cosmonauts probably get them trained Clooney and Sandra Bullock, because they are very well demonstrated in gravity," he wrote then columnist Teofil Pancic key phrase merry Serbian reality.

Now, what is Sigal known as someone who does not say much always the truth, maybe he was a mitigating circumstance to become a best mate with almost all the leading Serbian politicians. Also people that truthfulness is not a virtue.

Serbian President Tomislav Nikolic told him during the December meeting: "You are a friend of Serbia and obviously you recognize our virtues and soul, we know that we appreciate." Vucic was honored to be received by Sigala assessment of their economic policies, which as you pronounced a delighted member of his party: "The economy in Serbia is slowly growing, unlike other European countries," said Sigal that appear except in aikido, understood and economic developments in Europe. Who would say?!

Overshadowed and Santa Claus

Sigal before New Year's Eve street tree adornment even with the Mayor of Novi Sad. The shadow is thrown arrival of Santa Claus, the person who does not exist, because among the Serbs appeared Sigal, a person exists. He even said, unlike the proverbial sustained Santa Claus, that Serbia was his "new homeland".

"Yay! Sigal is a Serb!" Rejoiced the young and old. Especially when they heard that Seagal is not just a fan Vucic. It has excellent relations with Putin.

Hollywood actor and strongman was just one of many out amongst a plethora of various world 'face that appeared in Serbia "elated" Vucic reforms. All previous - by Dominic Strauss-Kahn to Tony Blair - in the meantime, have mysteriously disappeared. Each of them offered to help, some of the economic reforms, some in the organization of the Government, some martial arts, but, suddenly, as they came in, "hedlajnove" Serbian television, so they disappeared. Nobody knows where they are.

It is clear that Sigal will not long be the best friend of Serbian authorities: let 'to bet that it it is like visiting an exotic tribe in the Amazon. He informed the chief, returns, earned a pittance, and the time on the river, was unforgettable.

Now it's just a matter of time before the Serbs appear and Jackie Chan.

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IZAKOVIC