HOW YOU SAY THINGS TO PEOPLE IS EVERYTHING - and - WHAT ACTUALLY HAPPENED (personal short story)

I was asked what I did last night, so I said, “The wife and I went on a big date. I took her to the store to buy what she wanted, then we went and showered, then we went to dinner, then we went to a movie, then we went and had ice-cream. Lovely date.”

After telling my friend that, I said, “Now here is what actually happened. My wife and I went to Walmart and we bought a few things we needed and bought an already cooked chicken. Then we showered separately (we don’t have a shower where we live...we go elsewhere) then we rented a video, went home and ate chicken while watching the movie on the TV (Jack Reaper) and towards the end of the show she got the ice cream out of the fridge and we ate it.”

“So...” asked the friend, “what did you do for Valentines for your wife last year?”

“I got her flowers, took her to dinner, got a cake for dessert and went home.”

My friend being a little wiser asked, “So what did you really do?”

I took my wife to Walmart, and saw Valentines stuff and realized it was Valentines day, and then I saw some flowers and called my wife over and said, “Wow...smell these.” She came over a took a whiff and I said, “Happy Valentines Day.” Then I said, “let’s go out to dinner,” and I took her to the deli, and when we got there we sampled the free crackers, cheese and meat, and I said, “Let’s do dessert,” and so I took her to the bakery and we sampled some cookies. It was a lovely Valentines date.

After 47 years of marriage some folks can get away with that...some are not so lucky. Happy Valentines day everybody...whenever it is.