“Hi George,” said God, as he nodded his head at me in recognition that I exist. “You’re acting like me, George. You ought to be a politician. That’s where the real power is. And just to clear up a misunderstanding about energy and creation–no permission needed, but the consequences reverberate throughout all creation, so yes, I AM responsible for the actions of my creations. And as to freewill, go ahead and explain it George. This should be good.”

George stammered and coughed and blurted out, “Intelligences with will, make choices. It’s that simple. They are free to choose.”

“What do you think inspires an intelligence’s will to choose one course and not another?” asked God.

“Likes and dislikes,” said George. “If they think they’ll like it or not,” said George.

“And who do you think programmed their likes and dislikes?” asked God.

“Oh, said George.

“Free to choose means no compulsion, no coercion, no force,” said God. “Do you really think that a man’s mind, emotions, body and nature, and the nature he lives in–his environment–does not compel, coerce or force a response? Humans make choices, but they are not free-will choices. The choices humans make are compelled by mind, emotions, body, nature and the nature he lives in. Humans are not free. Humans are programmed to respond to input, each according to his individual and unique program.”

“Well that sucks!” said George. “I thought I was free.”

“So do most Americans,” said God. “Jokes on them.”

“What’s an ‘American’, I asked.

“EXCEPTIONALLY ignorant,” said George.

“That’s not a nice thing to say,” said God.

“Well you should know,” I said, “You created them.”

“You’re an annoying human,” said God.

“Yup! Must be my program,” I said. “You could ZAP me into oblivion. George tried and failed, maybe you could do it.”

“I’m considering it,” said God.

“DO IT!” said George.

“No... I’ll just let him suffer being human....send him to Earth....get married....THAT’LL TEACH HIM,” said God.

What’s ‘married’ mean?” I asked.

“Pure hell,” said George. “Way to go God.” hahahah.

THE END.

(God must have forgot about me because I’ve been happily married going on 47 years....maybe He's got Alzheimers...or the patience of God....whatever floats His boat).